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| Vol.3.100 | |
Enough Character Alreadyby Vince PoscenteAuthor of The Ant and the Elephant, Invinceable Principles and The Age of Speed
I knew the moment a one-legged woman bashed her scooter into my wheel chair I was due for another life lesson.
Playing hockey three weeks ago I broke my foot. It turns out that my twenty year-old mind is lapping my 47 year old reaction time. Cutting in front of a slap-shot the load bearing, 1st metatarsal in my left foot snapped upon the puck’s impact. So, here I am in a cast.
Have you had that feeling you’re sick and tired of more setbacks? Sure - they build character, but enough of this character development already.
The biggest lesson so far is this whole “asking for help” thing.
On a recent personality assessment I rated a 10 out of 10 on independence. I egotistically showed everyone how wonderfully independent I am. “If there was an 11 I would have scored that.” Somehow I thought this was a good thing.
A close friend of mine had polio when she was young. Last week she locked eyes with her typical compassion and said, “I hope you feel better soon Vince.”
“Neeti,” I said. “The thing with this broken foot that drives me crazy is asking for help.”
Neeti put her hand on my forearm and said, “My mother told me long ago that asking for help makes you a better, stronger person. If you don’t ask, people see you struggle and they will think you’re weak.”
Two days after I got my new crutches, I traveled to Florida for back-to-back speeches. I didn’t immediately ask for help. I struggled along pulling a roller bag with one finger while trying to support my weight with the other four fingers. I kept turning right. Suddenly a guy popped up to my side and said, “Would you like a hand?”
Later, boarding first, the pilot standing in the galley joked, “This must be new. You look as awkward as a high schooler on his first date.” People typically jump up and offer assistance. A little troll voice inside my big headed noggin wants to growl, “No thanks. I’ve got this.”
But I’ve learned to bite my lip and say, “Yes please. Thank you.”
Now when I check in I ask for a wheelchair. It is an acute lesson in humility and surrender. (Clearly something I needed to learn.) This whole independence, rugged individualism thing is fine for movies but not necessarily in real life. It’s okay to accept a lending hand and cede control now and then.
As for the woman with one leg. She lost it from a knee surgery gone bad. In three more weeks I’ll have the cast off. In three weeks she’ll be looking for more things she can do with what she has. It’s good to appreciate what you have, accept help when it’s offered and build a little more character along the way.
Until next week, it’s full speed ahead (in an “accepting help” sort of way),
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© 2010 Vince Poscente. All Rights Reserved. |